Welcome to Quill Quotes Book Club’s final discussion of The Boy Between: A Mother and Son’s Journey From a World Gone Grey! We hope you enjoyed the book. Note, this discussion covers the full book and will contain spoilers, so if you haven’t finished reading yet you may want to go back to the first discussion.
Kevin’s Thoughts
Unfortunately, I didn’t enjoy the book nearly as much as Brooke and rated it 3 stars. I was hoping the second half would be better and get more into Josh’s coping mechanisms and how he handled his depression but instead just seemed to continue their descriptions from the first half. As a description of what depression can be like to help lessen the stigma against mental illness, I do think this book can be valuable. However, in terms of coping with or helping someone with depression, many people won’t be able to just shut down like Josh did and have a room in their mom’s house always available. Josh was certainly lucky in this regard and while it seems he’s doing better at the time the book was published, I’d be interested to know how he holds up in the future.
Favorite Quote
“You get the message. It was for him an endless cycle of trying to make time pass or trying to make time stop.”
– Amanda Prowse, The Boy Between
“No one puts the truth on social media. You are effectively comparing your mundane life to other people’s highlight reels.”
– Josiah Hartley, The Boy Between
Brooke’s Thoughts
I really liked this book, I finished the second half in 2 sittings! Pretty much any book that can make me cry gets 5 stars! I also think it sends a good message about judging less and ending the mental health stigma. While it may not be a guide to cure depression, it’s definitely insightful for people who have never dealt with depression before.
Favorite Quote
“I guess it was also a way for me to escape the sour bubble in which were entombed – when you live in a small space it is hard to escape the suffocating nature of depression, even if it is not you who is depressed.”
– Amanda Prowse, The Boy Between
Vote
Sorry, this vote is now closed. The average rating was 4/5 stars!
The Boy Between Final Discussion Prompts/Questions
Feel free to comment whatever thoughts and questions you have! But if you aren’t sure where to start, consider some of the prompts/questions below:
- How do you think you would handle Josh’s situation? Either as him or his mum. Did the second half of the book change your answer at all?
- Do you think Josh would have gone back to his room to bleed out if not for his friend? Which suicide attempt did you find scarier/more serious, the pre-meditated pills or blackout drunk glass cut?
- Did the book change any of your opinions on depression or mental health?
- Who would you say is the book’s main target audience?
- Do you think Josh’s depression will continue to improve or will he struggle with it again in the future?
- Share a favorite quote!
Commenting
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We hope you enjoy this discussion and join us again next month! Vote in our February Book Selection now!
I do not know all the symptoms or triggers of depression. Since It was explained to me, I have never doubted that depression is an illness. I think that the authors describing their ordeal with the hope that other people will read it and resonate with is endearing. I am glad that Josh was able to take the steps he needed to start on the road to fighting in depression. I’m glad that Amanda did not have her child die prematurely and that she was there to help him when he needed it.
It seemed like the authors were hoping the university would be another parent and a wonderful environment fostering knowledge, insight and acceptance. Idyllic higher education should be that way. We have to be realists though and understand that colleges and universities are not another parent. They foster a competitive environment because they are a business. You give them money and they make you jump through hoops for a piece of paper that will hopefully allow you to make a living wage. Oh and they reap the prestige of any of their consumers who make it to prominent positions. Parents should be aware that while college is fun and can be an enlightening experience, it’s also brutal and extraordinarily demanding (especially in the STEM degrees)
There is a point made by the book that I have to address. Josh and Amanda lay out that college is not for everyone. That it is perfectly acceptable to leave if the experience is more detrimental than it is helpful. That college is not everyone’s path and that they understand that financial and social pressure might make it hard to even consider this as an option. They’re not wrong. But it is easy to say this when your parent is a successful author and your financial security is assured. And at this point it might sound like I’m one of the pressures telling children to stay in college no matter what. But my concern is for the children who left their abusive homes for the safety of college, or whose family used every last penny to send them to school or the children with no one to turn back to. It’s not that they shouldn’t leave if college is hurting them but the question arises of what their options are. It’s a paradoxical topic. It just seems a bit dangerous to present the option of leaving college without any kind of net but you also have to let people know that they should leave if any aspect of their person is in danger. I can’t answer what their options are either but I do know that the authors’ situation is financially unique so it cannot be a blanket statement for all.
I’m glad Josh was able to start climbing out of that dark hole and hopefully live a relatively normal life.
I wonder if Mandy had a wonderful college experience? If you don’t worry too much about grades or if things come easy to you, college can be a great experience. Or she thought it would be just like the movies.
Also, some people do flourish and grow because it is their first real shot at independence. College is the time everyone is trying to figure out what they want to do with their life and that can be very overwhelming. I agree college shouldn’t be expected to act as a parent since everyone is an adult. But they should have easily accessible resources for individuals who are struggling.
I agree their family is a unique situation. Most people can’t leave school and take the time they need to recover and decided what they want to do with their life. Maybe we just need more resources in general to help combat issues that result from a lack of money.
Thanks for reading with us! I enjoyed hearing your thoughts.
I felt like the man Amanda talked to on the bus after Simeon found Josh in such a bad state and had found the suicide pills hit the nail on the head. He said’ It is nothing to do with you. This is Josh’s journey,Josh’s battle, and he will have to figure it out. You can’t do it for him.’ I think it helped Amanda not blame herself and realize you can’t control this disease. I thought another powerful moment was when Simeon collapsed after he had returned from getting Josh after he cut himself while he was drunk. I believe this moment finally got through to Josh in understanding how his depression was affecting more than just him.
I would recommend this book to everyone just so people would gain insight on how Clinical depression is something you can’t just get over,it is a real disease and needs to be understood.
I really liked the phrase ‘people who need help sometimes look a lot like people who do not need help.’
I’m hoping more research in Mental Health will someday eliminate Mental Health disorders.
Yes, I also really liked that quote! I couldn’t imagine being a mother and not knowing how to stop your child’s suffering. It would be really hard to believe that you had nothing to do with it. Simeon collapsing shows just how much they cared and how hard it is to care for someone with depression, which goes along with the quote I shared.
I also loved the second quote you shared. There are so many people silently struggling that will never reach out for help. This is just another reason to treat everyone with respect and kindness.
I hope we do find better ways to treat mental health issues in the future. I’m really glad you like the book! Thanks for reading with us!